Lisa Bainham explains how language can make or break a conversation at a crucial moment in a patient’s experience of your dental practice.
In any patient-facing role, especially front of house (FOH), the way we speak matters. A lot. It’s not just what we say – it’s how we say it. The wrong choice of words can turn a simple exchange into a complaint, or worse, a confrontation.
We see it often: a patient becomes upset when asked to pay a deposit, update their medical history, or accept that something isn’t possible. These are standard parts of running a safe, professional practice – but how they’re communicated can either calm the waters or stir the storm.
When words work against us
Take payment terminology, for example. Words like ‘deposit’, ‘advance payment’, ‘booking fee’, or ‘reservation charge’ might all mean the same thing – but they don’t feel the same.
Deposit can sound like a test of trust: ‘Are you expecting me not to show up?’
Advance payment might feel risky: ‘What if I need to cancel?’
Booking fee can trigger defensiveness: ‘Why am I being charged just to book?’
Reservation charge feels softer – more like a mutual agreement.
It’s not just semantics. These words carry emotional weight, and patients react based on their own experiences and mood at the time. A simple tweak – like saying: ‘This charge secures your appointment and goes toward your treatment’ – can shift the tone from transactional to reassuring.
The flashpoints we often miss
There are a few common situations where language tends to trip us up.
When a patient wants something we can’t offer
Saying: ‘We don’t do that’ or ‘That’s not possible’ can sound blunt or dismissive. Instead, try: ‘Here’s what we can do’ or ‘Let’s look at the best alternative’.
When we ask for something mandatory
Medical history updates are essential, but ‘We need this before we can proceed’ can sound like a threat. Try, ‘To make sure we’re giving you the safest care, we just need a quick update’.
When emotions run high
If a patient becomes irate, it’s tempting to shut down the call. But frustration is often triggered by how the conversation was handled. Ending the call might seem like a solution, but it often leads to complaints, poor reviews, and broken trust.
When training is missing
Even the best internal systems – automated reminders, booking platforms, clear policies – can’t protect a practice from poor communication. If your team isn’t trained to handle sensitive conversations with empathy and clarity, the cracks will show.
Here’s what can happen:
- Customer service suffers: patients feel dismissed or blamed. They may not return – and they’ll tell others why
- Reputation takes a hit: one poorly handled call can lead to a scathing review, and a few of those can start to erode trust
- Diary gaps increase: a great booking system won’t help if patients are put off by tone. They’ll cancel – or never book at all
- Team morale drops: FOH staff who can’t manage conflict may feel overwhelmed and burnt out. That stress spills into every interaction.
If you know your systems are solid – appointments, reminders, processes – but still see gaps or tension, the issue might not be what you’re doing, but how it’s being said.
The power of training in language
The ability to have a positive conversation – even when the message isn’t what the patient wants to hear – is a skill. And like any skill, it can be taught.
With the right training, FOH teams can learn to:
- Use empathetic language: ‘I can see this is frustrating’ goes a long way
- Offer choices: ‘Would you prefer to update your history online or over the phone?’
- Reframe negatives: ‘Here’s what we can offer’ instead of ‘We can’t do that’
- Stay calm under pressure: de-escalation techniques help staff manage their own reactions, too.
Training also empowers teams to support one another. Confident communicators are less likely to feel defensive or drained, and more likely to turn difficult moments into positive patient experiences.
Building a culture of thoughtful communication
Ultimately, this isn’t just about scripts or stock phrases – it’s about creating a culture where every interaction is approached with empathy, clarity, and respect.
Words are powerful. They can build trust or break it. They can soothe or sting. And in healthcare, where emotions often run close to the surface, thoughtful communication isn’t just nice to have – it’s essential.
Supporting practice managers to succeed
Lisa is the chairperson of the Association of Dental Administrators and Managers (ADAM) – the UK’s only professional association dedicated to dental practice management. ADAM exists to champion, support and nurture dental practice managers through education, community and expert guidance.
Find out more at www.adam-aspire.co.uk.
This article is sponsored by Association of Dental Administrators and Managers (ADAM).
